World religions and great philosophers have warned us about pride, and there is plenty written about the dangers of being motivated by the desire to validate the appetites of our ego.

Proverbs 16:18 says, “Pride goes before destruction and a haughty spirit before a fall”.

Proverbs 11:2 says, “When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom.”

“Leave your pride, ego, and narcissism somewhere else. Reactions from those parts of you will reinforce your children's most primitive fears.” ― Henry Cloud

“Pride makes us long for a solution to things – a solution, a purpose, a final cause; but the better telescopes become, the more stars appear.” ― Julian Barnes, Flaubert's Parrot

“One sticks to an opinion because he prides himself on having come to it on his own, and another because he has taken great pains to learn it and is proud to have grasped it: and so, both do so out of vanity.” ― Friedrich Nietzsche

Pride and curiosity are polar opposite. One inspires us to seek clarity, wisdom, and perpetual learning. The other, compels us to validate, confirm, and defend.

Whenever I see people evangelizing their pride, it’s normally followed by lack of humility, a painful past, and arrogance driven by a need for approval.

In my experience, pride is often a wound that never heals and covered up with vanity which attempts to conceal our pain by demanding fealty to a set of beliefs that obviates our pain but fails to mend the injury.

Learning to live on less pride and focus more on improvement is a revelation that replaces theatrics with achievement and influence.

A little pride isn’t bad, but pride usually escalates into an echo chamber of attestation as we surround ourselves with people that confirm our perception of exceptionalism, despite demonstrable evidence of its validity.

So how do we infuse just enough pride to induce positive change without succumbing to the temptation of relying on pride as the catalyst for validating our opinions, beliefs, and personal prejudice?

TO BE BETTER ABOUT CONTROLLING OUR PRIDE NOTICE 6 THINGS:

01.PRIDE OF SPIRIT

I believe pride of the spirit drives much of the virtue signaling we see today. It’s often the people with no belief system that try so hard to convince everyone else of their righteousness. Whenever people pontificate about fashionable movements, taxing the rich, saving the planet or other social causes, I pause. What are they doing to make a difference, and do their actions validate their claims? Generally, they don’t.

02. PRIDE OF KNOWLEDGE

Ever notice how some people try so hard to convince us they're smart? I see it on social media often. The person that needs to come by and assert their opinion at the expense of embarrassing someone else. Elite academics indoctrinated in their beliefs criticize and condemn anything that contradicts their version of the truth. Highly opinionated people that love to argue and criticize often lack self-awareness and humility. Their pride drives arrogance and intolerance.

03. PRIDE OF POWER

The pride of power is driven by controlling behavior. People that try so hard to convince us they're capable and competent, but clearly lack the skills required to earn our respect and loyalty. They use legalistic methods to enforce their rules. They seek autonomy in how they provide leadership because questioning their judgment is an indictment of their incompetence. They need praise, admiration and take all the credit without any of the personal responsibility. They have narcissistic personalities that feature their grandiose perception of the world, which features their belief of being superior to everyone else. Wow, power can be dangerous.

04.PRIDE OF APPEARANCE

There’s nothing wrong with wanting to look and feel good, until it becomes an obsession. When our looks become the primary source of our identity, we have drifted in a bad direction. When people focus entirely on their appearance at the expense of refining their character, humility, compassion, empathy, and kindness, they gravitate off course. This preoccupation with looks leads to condemnation of anyone that doesn’t match our definition of being beautiful, and it’s all superficial..

05. PRIDE OF POSSESSION

Closely related to pride of appearance is pride of possession. People that are consumed with material acquisition believing it offers irredeemable satisfaction, invest everything in the accumulation of “things”. Bigger homes, fancier cars, more money and lavish lifestyles become the focus of their energy. In the process they jump on a hedonic treadmill driven by measuring their success against someone else. It’s a dangerous enterprise that leads to arrogance, lack of fulfillment, selfishness, and scarcity.

06. PRIDE OF OPINION

We are seeing how pride of opinion is driving people apart. Every self-proclaimed expert on the troubling topics of our time asserting their beliefs with absolute certainty. Sadly enough, even the experts are often confused. People that advocate “science” with absolute certainty know nothing about science. At the heart of scientific endeavor is a realization that the truth requires constant exploration, testing, and questioning. Anyone claiming to have all the answers based on “predications” and “assumptions” isn’t a scientist, they are advocating an agenda. Beware of the “overly opinionated”.

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