Several months ago, a good friend reached out and shared a story that reminded me how vindictive some people can be.

She consulted with a potential client that proceeded to block her from social media, then set off to ruin her reputation by spreading lies, gossip, and rumors.

Desperate for the appropriate response, she reached out and asked for my advice.

There’s not much you can do if somebody decides to seek retribution because your success has triggered an avalanche of negative emotions.

I had a friend that played in the NBA over 30 years ago. A brief career spent mostly on the bench thrust him into the real world unexpectedly when he realized his basketball days were done.

For the past 3 decades he’s been “chasing” get rich quick schemes that never materialized. Bitcoin, real estate, hot stocks, business trends. Everything he touched turned to dust, because he lacked discipline, focus, and purpose.

When I launched my personal brand 3 years ago, I asked if he would read my book and offer a review. He did, then suddenly deleted it after setting up a bogus Facebook account and leaving disparaging comments on my videos.

I received better treatment from strangers and was astonished that a person I once considered a friend was capable of such implacable behavior.

Tough lessons and a strong reminder that some people operate with such scarcity they only succeed when someone else fails.

I have seen this tragic display of errant human deportment on many occasions.

In response, its easy to envision forms of vengeance that will obviate the scars. Unfortunately, that requires time and energy that could be allocated for rising above the infraction.

Despite legal action in cases that are so egregious, our only recourse is excellence.

The best way to vitiate the pernicious effects of our enemies. Ascend even higher and make it clear their toxic attempts to spoil our momentum are inefficacious.

"We do not merely destroy our enemies ; we change them."

--GEORGE ORWELL, 1984

7 WAYS TO MAKE YOUR ENEMIES LESS RELEVANT:

01. UNDERSTAND

Understanding the enemy is essential for recognizing the motivation behind their insidious behavior. Once we appreciate the inspiration behind the assault, we can separate what feels incredibly personal from the unhealthy behavior of an individual that attacks anything that reminds them of their countless failures. Success, accomplishment, and achievement bring out the worst in people that have given up on being great.

02. AVOID

The best defense with bullies and obnoxious adversaries is to ignore them. Avoidance goes a long way to ensure we limit contact with losers that use antagonism, hostility, and bravado as a tool to provoke a reaction. Block and delete these people. They will never be your friend and you will never win their approval. Move on.

"Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much."

03. IGNORE

Closely associated with avoiding people, is simply ignoring them. Sometimes at work we don’t have the luxury to avoid our nemesis. However, we can ignore them and offer them the cold shoulder of rejection. It’s a powerful tool and effective strategy for sending a signal to a narcissist that craves attention. I don’t care what you think of me because I don’t spend a second thinking about you.

04. ACTIONS

People that hurl insults are shallow and lack substance. The adage “sticks and stones may break my bones” is hard to apply when words have the capacity to be so hurtful. However, we must stay focused and act on our ambitions, and let our accomplishments speak for themselves. No better way to silence critics than to establish a pattern of extraordinary success.

05. MITIGATE

It’s easy to obsess over hurtful comments, meanspirited personal attacks and scathing reviews. However, we need to divest the need to make things personal by obviating the effects of our ego in favor of considering the source. Mitigating the impact of unsolicited criticism that is harsh, cruel, and unjustified isn’t something we need to internalize. Let it go and move on.

06. EVOLVE

By making a commitment to constant improvement we refuse to let anyone impede our progress. We have the emotional insight to recognize people that lash out are burdened with a litany of issues that are unrelated to us. Keep growing and focus on self-care. Do things that you find enjoyable, relaxing, and fulfilling.

07. ENDURE

Most bullies and cyber thugs have little stamina. They operate in a world of immediate gratification. They are usually misfits that lack clarity and focus but can’t resist pulling other people down. Especially people that are brave enough to live their purpose. Developing endurance is imperative for enduring the distance that separates winners from losers. Losers never finish strong, they only sprint from the starting blocks then fizzle 1 mile into a marathon.

"Never interrupt your enemy when they are making mistakes."

-- NAPOLEON BONAPARTE

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